Dark Frontier

By Colin 'Zeke' Hayman
Posted at December 25, 2004 - 2:36 PM GMT

See Also: 'Dark Frontier' Episode Guide

Borg: We're Borg. Get assimilated. Resistance sucks.
Janeway: No, you do. Blow 'em up, boys.
Tuvok: Target destroyed.
Janeway: Excellent. Let's steal their stuff.

Janeway: Look at all this. We rock!
Chakotay: Don't get used to it.
Janeway: I think I will.

Seven: I found a damaged sphere.
Janeway: Excellent. BWAHAHAHAHA!

Janeway: So the plan is, we break in and steal their transwarp coil. I call it Operation Fort Knox.
Paris: But nobody ever succeeded at breaking into--
Janeway: Quiet, you!

Janeway: Think you could look up your parents' notes? They were experts on the Borg.
Seven: But they got themselves assimi--
Janeway: Quiet, you!

Neelix: Here's the stuff. Your parents studied the Borg, eh?
Seven: Yes. They sucked.
Neelix: Yeah, but what're you gonna do?

Magnus: Mind if we leave Earth and never come back, honey?
Annika: Okay.

Annika: I can't sleep.
Magnus: Okay, don't.
Erin: Hey, a cube!
Magnus: Excellent. BWAHAHAHAHA!

Chakotay: There's the sphere.
Everybody: Ooooooo.

Chakotay: Guys, you're just about out of time!
Seven: Wait -- I need to pause ominously. Okay, now I'm ready.
Janeway: Energize!
Chakotay: Well, now you've done it! There's Borg up here!
Janeway: Oh well. End program.

Naomi: Hi, Seven. Mind if I freak you out by imitating your younger self?
Seven: Yes.
Naomi: Too bad. Check out my new implant!
Borg Queen: Hey, Seven. Wanna save your crew's lives by rejoining us?
Seven: I'll think about it.

Magnus: Eww, they're dismantling that drone.
Erin: (over the comm) You'd better come back before they see you.
Magnus: Nah.

Seven: My parents used these thingies to hide from the Borg.
Doc: Sounds like you're starting to like them now.
Seven: They sucked! How many times do I have to tell you?

Janeway: Never mind, I want you on the ship.
Seven: I don't want me on the ship!
Janeway: Okay.

Borg: Hey, that shuttle looks cool. Let's get it. Wakey wakey.

Janeway: They're getting the shuttle. Let's move!

Tuvok: There goes the coil.
Janeway: We did it! Let's get out of here!
Seven: No.
Janeway: Please?
Seven: No.
Janeway: Okay. Bye.

Paris: There goes the sphere.
Kim: We won and yet we lost. I sure hope there's a Part Two....

Borg Queen: Welcome home.
Seven: Uh oh....

Borg Queen: I put you on Voyager.
Seven: Liar.
Borg Queen: Go to your room!

Chakotay: Maybe she was planning to leave anyway.
Neelix: Maybe we should shut down her alcove.
Janeway: Maybe you both suck!

Naomi: Try getting her back like this.
Janeway: No. But we will get her back.
Naomi: Aw.

Seven: What now?
Borg Queen: I dunno. We could go assimilate some people, I guess.
Seven: I object.
Borg Queen: In that case, let's do it.

Magnus: Now this drone is cool.
Annika: Why?
Magnus: He works for the Queen.
Annika: Don't they all?
Magnus: Quiet, you!

Chakotay: The Hansens were smart, but they messed up.
Janeway: Let's do exactly what they did and see what happens.

Janeway: So the plan is, we'll take the Delta Flyer after Seven and possibly never come back.
Paris: Bravo! Brilliant plan!
Janeway: You're coming.
Paris: Damn.

Borg Queen: The aliens are blowing us up. What do we do?
Seven: This.
Borg Queen: Good job. Now go watch them all get assimilated.

Seven: Eww! This is disgusting. I think I'll save a few.

Borg Queen: Did you have fun?
Seven: No!
Borg Queen: Not my fault. By the way, I'm not going to let those guys you saved escape.
Seven: Pretty please with a cherry on top?
Borg Queen: Oh, all right.

Erin: Uh oh, the Borg saw us!
Annika: They're gonna assimilate us, aren't they?
Magnus: Look on the bright side -- it's just for the next 18 years or so.

Doc: You know, Seven was right. Her parents did suck.
Janeway: At least their suckrifice was not in vain.
Doc: One more pun and I'm ruling you unfit for duty.

Paris: There it is -- the Borg omnicomplex thingy.
Everybody: Ooooooo.

Seven: I am not helping you assimilate humanity!
Borg Queen: Come on. You know you want to. All your friends are doing it.
Magnus the Drone: Join us...join us....
Borg Queen: Hold the Evil Dead parodies -- here comes Janeway.

Tuvok: There she is. Let's go kick some Borg butt.

Borg Queen: I say "humph" to their sort-of-cloaking-device. We'll get 'em.
Seven: No you won't.
Borg Queen: Shut up, you!

Janeway: I'm in!
Tuvok: Yeah, but they can see you now.
Janeway: Boy, it's just one thing after another around here.

Doctor: AAAAAAH! They're shooting us!
Paris: What did you expect, chocolates?

Janeway: Pick me!
Borg Queen: No, pick me!
Seven: Now that's a no-brainer. Let's blow this joint!

Doc: We got her back! What a happy ending.
Paris: Ain't over yet -- Queenie's in pursuit.
Janeway: Set course back for Voyager and burn rubber!

Torres: Something suspiciously Borg-like is coming.
Chakotay: Uh oh. Let's get ready to rumble!

Janeway: We're back, and we've got Seven!
Chakotay: Cool.
Janeway: Oh yeah, and there's Borg.
Chakotay: Blow 'em up, boys.

Captain's Log: We kicked some Borg butt.

Seven: Sorry about all that stuff, Captain.
Janeway: Hey, don't sweat it. Now go to your room.
(Voyager continues homeward at Ludicrous Speed)


Find more episode info in the Episode Guide.

Colin 'Zeke' Hayman is one of the contributors of Five-Minute Voyager, where sci-fi episodes are reduced to "fivers" of one-twelfth their original length.