Concerning Flight

By Kira
Posted at December 25, 2004 - 2:11 PM GMT

See Also: 'Concerning Flight' Episode Guide

da Vinci: Whew. Good thing we tried our glider above the river, or we would be dead.
Janeway: Nah. The safeties were on.
da Vinci: The what?
Janeway: Uh...gotta go, the ship's shaking.

Kim: Hey! They're stealing our stuff!
Aliens: Nyaa nyaa. Finders keepers.
Janeway: Blow them up good, Tuvok.
Tuvok: What if the computer that we need is on the ship I destroy?
Janeway: Shut up and do as I tell you.

Chakotay: They took lots of our stuff, like the Captain's favorite boom stick.
Doc: Whine whine whine. I want my mobile emitter!
Janeway: Meh. I'll see what I can do. The important thing is the big guns...I mean, our computer.

Harry: Hi, Seven.
Seven: Boo.
Harry: Eep! I mean, you don't intimidate me.
Seven: What if I stand close enough to you that we could share a uniform?
Harry: (squeaking) Nope.

Tuvok: Looks like we can blend in.
Janeway: Excellent. I'll lead the away mission.
Tuvok: Aren't captains supposed to stay away from dangerous away missions?
Janeway: Not on this show -- you're thinking of Riker and Picard on TNG. Now quit arguing with me.
Chakotay: Yeah, Tuvok -- this way I get to play Captain.

Tuvok: These guys have been busy -- there's lots of stolen stuff.
Janeway: What about our computer?
Tuvok: This early in the episode? Get real.

da Vinci: Look at all the cool stuff I can build.
Janeway: Hey! A phaser!
da Vinci: Don't touch that, you idiot! If you're armed now you can't get into trouble later.

Sleazeball Alien: This stuff? I found it...yeah, that's right.
Chakotay: What do we look like, a bunch of morons?
Sleazeball Alien: Well, I did see "False Profits"...
Paris: Tell us everything and we'll let you keep the stuff, but you can't use the gun to rob us or anything.
Sleazeball Alien: Deal! I got it from Tau.
(The alien leaves with the big gun)
Neelix: Um...didn't we nearly get killed the first two seasons trying to keep stuff away from the Kazon?
Chakotay: Yeah, but we're only picky about that when it's convenient for the story.

Janeway: Tuvok, keep Leonardo busy.
Tuvok: How?
Janeway: By making small talk and playing into humorous Vulcan stereotypes -- do I have to think of everything?
Tuvok: So, you like...stuff?
da Vinci: Meh.

Janeway: If I flirt with you, will you be nice to me?
Tau: For now at least.
Janeway: Good. I need a large, say, from a starship.
Tau: What a coincidence. I just got one. It belonged to a little old lady who only used it on Sundays. And it comes with an extended warranty.
Janeway: How can I lose?

Tuvok: Captain, we should go back to the ship.
Janeway: Ha! Why would I do that when I can hang around with Leo and get into trouble?
Tuvok: Riiiiight.

Doc: Whine whine whine. I want gossip. Anything interesting?
Seven: B'Elanna and I got in an offscreen catfight,
Doc: I want details.
Tuvok: (over the comm) Nice try. Seven, report to Astrometrics.
Doc: Drat. Whine whine whine.

Janeway: (to her commbadge) Break into a heavily armed fortress with the help of a hologram who thinks he's in 16th-century America? No problem.
Tau: Gotcha.
Janeway: Drat.
Tau: (takes her commbadge) Guess what? I'm really a jerk. I'm going to hold you for ransom.
Janeway: Bite me.
Blunt Object in da Vinci's Hands: THUNK.
Tau: Drat.
da Vinci: He must be a magician - he made your commbadge dissapear so you can't find it even when he's unconscious.
Janeway: Quiet! Don't point out the plot holes!

da Vinci: (pointing to tricorder) What is that?
Janeway: Uh...a compass.
da Vinci: How does it work?
Janeway: Magic.
da Vinci: That's what you say about everything.

Janeway: Woo hoo! It's the computer! Escape at last.
Tau's Goons: That's what you think!
(They shoot at her while the computer dematerializes)
Janeway: Crud.

da Vinci: Explain all this cool stuff!
Janeway: No.
da Vinci: I'm not going anywhere until you tell me.
Janeway: How about a metaphor? You're as dumb as a canary compared to me.
da Vinci: That's a simile, but it works for me.

Chakotay: Can you beam the Captain out yet?
Kim: No, it's not close enough to the end of the episode.
Chakotay: Right -- we'll let them get in a little more trouble first.

Janeway: You expect me to fly in THAT?
da Vinci: It's either that or get shot.
Janeway: When you put it that way...WHEEEEEE!

Kim: The episode's almost over and they've already made a daring escape...can I get them now?
Chakotay: Sure.

Janeway: That was fun -- let's do it again!
Paris: Fun for you, maybe -- this was totally a Janeway episode. The rest of us barely got a word in edgewise.
Torres: Yeah -- I didn't even get one stinkin' line in this fiver.
Tuvok: Not only that, there were plot holes big enough to fly that glider through.
Janeway: Grrrr! I've had enough of you people making fun of the plot holes!
(Janeway throws her staff out an airlock at Ludicrous Speed)


Find more episode info in the Episode Guide.

Kira is one of the contributors of Five-Minute Voyager, where sci-fi episodes are reduced to "fivers" of one-twelfth their original length.