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For the Cause

By Derek Dean
Posted at December 25, 2004 - 4:13 PM GMT

See Also: 'For the Cause' Episode Guide

Eddington: Following the explosion of a moon by the Klingons, the Cardassian economy is in a very weakened condition. As a gesture of goodwill, the Federation has decided to give them breadmakers and churns.
Kira: Wait. How could a moon cause the destruction of the Cardassian economy?
Eddington: They had invested all their money in natural satellite surveillance. I guess you could say it was their bread and butter.

Odo: I've got some good news and some bad news. The bad news is that we suspect Kasidy Yates is running supplies to the Maquis.
Sisko: Crap! What's the good news?
Odo: Rats. I knew I forgot something!

Sisko: I can't believe Kasidy is a smuggler. What's your evidence?
Odo: Well, she has a large collection of French history books.
Sisko: That doesn't mean anything.
Eddington: Also, her ship has the words "Maquis Smuggler" spray-painted on the side in hot pink.
Sisko: I think it'd mean more if it weren't in your handwriting.

Bashir: Would you stop looking at Ziyal?
Garak: What's wrong with it? We're both half-Cardassian.
Bashir: You're half-Cardassian? What's your other half?
Garak: Why, Cardassian, of course.

Kasidy: Did you miss me while I was on my last run?
Sisko: Yeah, what were you doing?
Kasidy: I was supplying the, uh, Notmaquis with weapo-- pots. Weapots.
Sisko: What are those?
Kasidy: I didn't ask.

Kasidy: Hey! What's going on here?
Odo: An inspection. The only question is, will it take 2 hours, 4 hours, 6 hours, or 8 hours?
Kasidy: I'd like to use a lifeline and call Ben.
Sisko: (over the comm) Odo, make it take 0 hours.
Odo: That's cheating!

Eddington: I can't believe you're letting her get away!
Sisko: Oh geez, if you love her so much, why don't you marry her?
Eddington: I'm more of a stalker. Can I follow her in the cloaked Defiant?
Sisko: Be my guest.

Ziyal: Hello, Garak. I'm scared of you.
Garak: Don't play coy with me. I know you want me.
Ziyal: Um, okay.

O'Brien: Crap. I've lost sight of the Xhosa. Now we'll never know if Kasidy's a smuggler.
Eddington: Oh, I just remembered! We happen to know the paths the Maquis take in the Badlands which we got from, um, Starfleet Intelligence! Yeah, that's it.
Worf: Excellent. Death to the opposition!

O'Brien: The Maquis aren't so bad. Right?
Worf: Wrong, the Maquis are traitors and deserve death. Right, Eddington?
Eddington: I have no comment.
O'Brien: Why does your eye twitch every time someone says "Maquis"?

Ziyal: Hello, Garak. I want you.
Garak: Hm. Maybe you don't want me after all.
Ziyal: Why do you assume I mean the opposite of what I say?
Garak: I assume that of everyone.

Eddington: So Kasidy's ship beamed stuff over to the Maquis.
Sisko: ARGH! My own girlfriend betrayed me! At least I still have my faithful security officer.

Sisko: Kasidy's going to make another run tonight.
Odo: I say we arrest them.
Eddington: I say the Captain arrest them so I can stay here and protect the replicators.
Sisko: Thanks, faithful security officer!

Sisko: Wait, Kasidy, instead of doing your run, why don't we go to Risa?
Kasidy: Then who would make my run?
Sisko: Why don't you let your first officer Logan make it?
Kasidy: Nah, he's too old for it.

Kira: Garak, can I talk to you about your date with Ziyal?
Garak: Certainly, Major. What do you have to say?
Kira: You probably should have that black eye looked at before you cancel your date with her.
Garak: What black --
(PUNCH!)

O'Brien: The Xhosa seems to have been in some sort of holding pattern for the past six hours.
Sisko: Man, I knew Maquis airports were crowded, but this is ridiculous.

Kasidy: Hi, Ben. How'd you find out we were smugglers?
Sisko: Eddington painted "Maquis Smuggler" on the side of your ship.
Kasidy: Eddington did that? Why that no-good, lying traitor!
Sisko: Wait, Eddington's a traitor?

Eddington: Load those breadmakers on to that unmarked ship over there and then take control of the station.
Reese: Okay.
Eddington: Oh, and Major? I'd do something about that black eye before Sisko returns.
Kira: What black --
(PUNCH!)

Eddington: (over the comm) Ha ha! Fooled you! Now stop persecuting us.
Sisko: Not likely.
Eddington: Then I'll give a speech.
Sisko: Crap.

Ziyal: Oh, hi, Garak. I -- What happened to your face?
Garak: The same thing that'll happen to yours if you don't tell me why I'm here.
Ziyal: Because I'm attracted to you. Though I have to admit, it's waning fast.
Garak: Phew.

Kasidy: I'm back and ready to go to Risa for some rest and relaxation.
Sisko: I'll give you a rest. Guards, arrest that woman!
Kasidy: But what about us? After all, I still love you.
(Sisko is enraptured by this news at Ludicrous Speed)

THE END

Find more episode info in the Episode Guide.


Derek Dean is one of the contributors of Five-Minute Voyager, where sci-fi episodes are reduced to "fivers" of one-twelfth their original length.

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