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The Mind's Eye

By Kira
Posted at December 25, 2004 - 5:33 PM GMT

See Also: 'The Mind's Eye' Episode Guide

La Forge: Computer, I need some entertainment. Let's play a guessing game.
Computer: Shouldn't you be driving the shuttle?
La Forge: Shut up and make with the games.
Computer: Fine. Guess who just missed a Romulan ship decloaking in front of their shuttle?
La Forge: Oo, I know this one....

Picard: You know what we need? Some foreshadowing for an end-of-season cliffhanger.
Ambassador Kell: Hello. I'm here to establish conflict within the Klingon Empire and Romulan interference in our political affairs.
Picard: Excellent.

La Forge: There...are...four...lights!
Taibak: I haven't started the interrogation yet, you wuss. I'm just looking for the play button...ah, here it is.
La Forge: What the...Aaaaaaaaa! Make it stop!
Taibak: And after "Angel One," we're going to make you watch "Shades of Gray."

Mysterious Romulan: I would like to establish myself as a shadowy villain to foreshadow later episodes.
Taibak: Noted. You know, you sound a lot like....
Mysterious Romulan: Shhh! It says mysterious Romulan, you imbecile.

Taibak: You must kill Chief O'Brien.
La Forge: But I like Chief O'Brien. He's a recurring character, which makes for really good continuity.
Taibak: Pretend he's Wesley Crusher.
La Forge: DIE! DIE! DIEDIEDIEDIEDIE!

Troi: (filing her nails) So, how was your vacation?
La Forge: I was tortured and brainwashed by a bunch of Romulans.
Troi: Uh-huh, that's nice.

Vagh: You have been collaborating with the rebels, you treacherous Romulans!
Picard: You just gave away the ending.
Vagh: Oops.

La Forge: Doesn't inspecting this phaser make you want to assassinate somebody?
Data: Me? No.

La Forge: Computer, transport these weapons to the rebels and make sure I don't find out about it later.
Computer: Oh, so now we're playing hide and seek?

Picard: Who could have tampered with the transporters?
La Forge: I don't know, but whoever it was is sure a genius. Yup, really clever. And I'll bet he's good-looking, too.
Picard: Ha ha, don't be ridiculous. I was nowhere near the transporters.

Worf: All right, I'll need alibis from all of you.
Data: Why don't you just ask the computer where we were?
Worf: I need something to do.
La Forge: Everyone has an airtight alibi except me.
Worf: Well, I'm stumped.

Kell: I hereby establish myself as a nefarious villain.
La Forge: Shouldn't there have been some kind of foreshadowing for that?
Kell: We used up our quota for one episode already.

Crusher: You can't sleep? Is something bothering you?
La Forge: Just post-traumatic stress disorder from being brainwashed by Romulans.
Crusher: Uh-huh. Let me get you some nice steamed milk.

Data: What kind of signal are the sensors detecting?
Computer: A signal that could interface with Commander La Forge's visor and induce him to commit murder.
Data: Disregard that hypothesis. This would only work if he had been brainwashed.

Data: (over the comm) Worf, arrest Geordi.
Worf: Any particular reason?
Data: The computer seems to think it's a good idea.

Data: Some Romulans brainwashed Geordi to kill Vagh. The traitor is either Captain Picard or Ambassador Kell.
Vagh: I think we all know who the guilty party is.
Data: Agreed. You are under arrest. (CLICK) You have the right to remain silent.
Picard: Get these handcuffs off me, you moron!

Troi: Tell me about the shuttle ride.
La Forge: Well, I was playing trivia games with the computer when this Romulan ship decloaked....
Troi: But can you remember anything about Romulans?
La Forge: That's it -- I give up. You people can do your own foreshadowing.
(Ominous music plays at Mediocre Speed)

THE END

Find more episode info in the Episode Guide.


Kira is one of the contributors of Five-Minute Voyager, where sci-fi episodes are reduced to "fivers" of one-twelfth their original length.

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