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Attached

By Marc Richard
Posted at December 25, 2004 - 7:29 PM GMT

See Also: 'Attached' Episode Guide

Crusher: Beverly calling Jean-Luc. Answer me or I'll throw a croissant at you....
Picard: I'm sorry...my attention must have drifted.
Crusher: Are you preoccupied about our upcoming Away Mission?
Picard: No, I just find your stories about Nurse Ogawa boring.
(BONK!)
Picard: Ouch.
Crusher: Just be glad I didn't put jam on it first.

Kes Official: (over the comm) Enterprise, the two officers you beamed down a moment ago never arrived.
Worf: Fill out a lost-cargo claim form and we will try to locate them for you.

Picard: Why did you xenophobic Prytt kidnap us?
Lorin: To protect ourselves from having any contact with you Earthlings.
Crusher: Like this conversation, for instance?
Lorin: I said we were reclusive. I never said we were smart.

Data: My analysis shows the Captain and Doctor did not have travel insurance.
Riker: Makes sense. Transporting is supposed to be safe and foolproof.
Worf: That is what Lieutenant Barclay keeps claiming.

Crusher: The guard brought me my tricorder! It contains an escape map!
Picard: Too bad. I thought he was bringing us lunch.

Riker: The Captain and Doctor were kidnapped by the Prytt?
Mauric: Yes. They're fanatic isolationists who accuse us of being paranoid.
Riker: Why would the Prytt say that about the Kes?
Mauric: Because they're all out to get us!

Worf: You may use these quarters while you are on the ship.
Mauric: Could anyone spy on us through the keyhole?
Worf: The doors do not have a keyhole.
Mauric: Hah! I'm not falling for that old trick!

Riker: This is the Enterprise calling the Prytt Ministry of Internal Affairs.
Prytt Official: (over the comm) What? Where did you get our number?
Riker: From your so-called "Complete Planetary Telephone Directory."
Prytt Official: But why are you calling us?
Riker: Because yours is the only number listed there.

Crusher: I have a theory about what these brain implants are for.
Picard: Yes, that's my guess too.
Crusher: I know.

Crusher: The telepathic link is forcing us to stay close to each other.
Picard: It's almost like being chained together, isn't it?
Crusher: Where did you get that image from? Some old Tony Curtis movie?

Crusher: Over the years, I've learned not to say every stupid thing that pops into my mind.
Picard: You mean that there's still hope for Deanna?

Riker: I assure you the Federation is not conspiring with the Prytt.
Mauric: Hah! What kind of gullible, idiotic fool do you think I am?
Riker: I don't think of you as gullible, sir.

Crusher: You were in love with me? Why didn't you ever tell me or my husband?
Picard: It's wrong for two Starfleet officers to be involved with the same shipmate.
Crusher: I guess you're right. Deanna's lucky she's never had that problem.

Mauric: Your secret plot doesn't fool us!
Lorin: And your secret plot doesn't fool us!
Riker: Good. Now that we agree on something, let me make a few pointed threats.

Prytt Guard: (over the comm) We've finally managed to capture the escaped humans.
Lorin: Excellent. Release them.

Picard: Should we explore the feelings we've discovered for each other?
Crusher: We'd better not. I'm worried we'll end up like Will and Deanna.
Picard: Call me an optimist if you want, but I still have hopes for those two.
Crusher: Show me a wedding invitation from them and I'll believe you.
(The Enterprise sails away at Ludicrous Speed)

THE END

Find more episode info in the Episode Guide.


Marc Richard is one of the contributors of Five-Minute Voyager, where sci-fi episodes are reduced to "fivers" of one-twelfth their original length.

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